Archive for the ‘Relationships’ Category
For one caller to the GLBT National Help Center, coming out to his parents started with a phone call that went like this:
Son: “I have something I want to talk to you both about. But I’m really not sure how to put it.”
Mom: (short silence) “Then why don’t you just PUT IT.”
Son: (another short silence) “I’m gay.”
Mom: (gasp) “I knew you were going to say that.”
Dad: “Are you just feeling like you are gay? Or are you living the gay lifestyle. Because if you are that is what is wrong.”
Son: “Yes Dad. I’m living the gay lifestyle. If that is what you want to call it.”
The caller said that he was living on his own and had a stable career when he made this call. The call ended by the parents telling him that they still loved him and they would work through this together.
That evening he called the GLBT National Help Center to talk to a peer councilor about the call and was equally upset and relieved.
By the end of the his call with us, he had not only talked through some of his frustrations, but he also had a list of local services in his town that may be of help to a gay man living alone.
While coming out and “being gay” is becoming more acceptable for some, it is still a very painful and traumatic process for many.
The GLBT National Help Center is here for that reason. We offer not only peer counseling and facts about safe sex, but we also offer referrals through our massive database of GLBT related services.
Toll-free 1-888-THE-GLNH (1-888-843-4564)
Monday thru Friday from 1pm to 9pm, pacific time
(Monday thru Friday from 4pm to midnight, eastern time)
Saturday from 9am to 2pm, pacific time
(Saturday from noon to 5pm, eastern time)
Every holiday season, the hotline sees a jump in calls dealing with the anxiety of seeing relatives who are non-accepting or non-tolerant of those who identify as gay, lesbian, bisexual and/or transgender. It is often depressing for those in the queer community to think about interacting with groups of people who do not respect or acknowledge who they are or whom they love. There’s a reason that those in the queer community refer to each other as “family,” even if they’ve just met — historically, they’ve chosen their own families for support.
Many callers find solace in the idea of holding several celebrations, making sure to include time with people who are supportive — chosen family. It can offset a difficult gathering of blood relatives if they have recently had affirmation that their accepting friends love them regardless of their orientations or gender identifications.
Still other callers benefit from being reminded that they can make choices about who they choose to see around the holidays (and any time of year). If people are not respectful of who they are, they can choose to limit interactions with them.
Are you just now getting over a family get-together? Give us a call, send an email or start a chat. We’re here for you!
This Australian commercial perfectly captures the acceptance that we at the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender (GLBT) National Help Center strive to achieve for everyone in the queer community.
While the majority of our calls, chats and emails deal with coming-out and the related feelings that arise from this process, we also receive a large number of contacts from people who want to talk about problems they are having in romantic relationships. These callers often are not out to their friends and families or have been rejected by their families for being gay, lesbian, bisexual and/or transgendered, and so they can feel extremely isolated.
These callers want to talk about issues that can arise in any romantic relationship: In-laws, household chores, miscommunications, etc. But because of the pronouns (he/she/his/her), they are unable to share these otherwise run-of-the-mill discussions with anyone in their lives. It is a true reflection of how alone individual members of the queer community can feel when they cannot share with others such a fundamental aspect of themselves like sexual orientation or gender identity. It results in not being able to discuss one’s partner, spouse, date or boyfriend/girlfriend.
Do you need to talk about a problem you’re having with a significant other or romantic interest? Please get in touch with us. Our volunteer peer-counselors can help.